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21 Questions ESPN's College GameDay Staff Should, But Won't Ask Lane Kiffin

We all want to know.

If you haven't heard, Lane Kiffin will be making an appearance on ESPN's College GameDay this upcoming Saturday. We figured we'd give the staff some suggestions on what to ask the much-maligned former USC head coach, '21 Questions' style.

1. Be honest, were you actually upset about being asked about a player's injury here, or did you just really have to go to the bathroom?

2. You're facing 3rd-and-long. Why the bubble screen every single time?

3. Condoleezza Rice now has a more prominent role in college football than you do. Your thoughts?

4. What do you have against dessert?

5. Have you ever actually met Snoop Dogg?

6. Has Silas Redd ever met Snoop Dogg?

7. Which of the following is/was more deflated? USC's 2012 game balls or your ego?

8. Did you really think this guy was on your side...?

9. You banned the media from USC's practices. How did you think the media would react?

10. Is karma really a Butch?

11. Rate the below tweet on a level of 1-to-ridiculously sarcastic.

12. USC fans not only drink because of you, they started naming drinks after you. Any idea why?

13. What on earth did you do to Demario Richard?

14. Is it safe to now ask Cody Kessler about the whole jersey-switching thing last year against Colorado?

15. What were you really doing before the Sun Bowl dinner?

16. You lied about voting for your own team No. 1 last season. Tell us the thought process there.

17. How do you feel about Taiwanese animation?

18. Do you think Paul Finebaum compared you to Miley Cyrus because you "came in like a wrecking ball" everywhere you've been?

19. Rumor has it that Alshon Jeffery is looking for someone to pump his gas - would you be interested in the opening?

20. How the heck did you wind up getting home from the Arizona State game?

...and finally:

21. Well, at least you still have your hot wife...right?